The power of kindness!

In the last 3 days, I've had the misfortune of seeing adults treating each other with anger and hostility.  Right now it's summer, where you would think people would be happy on a sunny day.  On Saturday, I was out for a run and I saw a car full of men yelling obscenities at a motorcyclist who was riding in the lane next to them.  I heard the motorcyclist speeding up to try to get away.  Now I don't know what may have happened prior to seeing them yelling, but I do know the motorcyclist was keen on riding away as fast as possible.  Then while I was on a beach "boardwalk" running, I saw an annoyed cyclist touch the shoulder of a man riding his skateboard.  The cyclist also said obscenities at the skateboarder who was so surprised at being yelled at and touched on the shoulder that he flew off his board.  These were all grown adults.

Yesterday, while walking toward the pier I had an older gentleman say something rude to me, and then today while I was at Costco I had a couple turn out of the aisle, look at me with my cart, and they said, "Excuse you."  I was not even in their way and I couldn't help but think how rude they were.  It's funny because I normally have such pleasant interactions with people since I worked retail customer service for more than a decade and I'm in a line of work where I help others.  I noticed though that these unpleasant interactions affected my mood and my day.  Seeing and hearing what I did made me upset and outweighed the pleasant interactions I had with people over the last 3 days.  It's strange how the negative often sticks with us more than the positive in life.  They say that 1 bad review outweighs 10 good reviews, and I think in life unfortunately many times 1 negative comment can outweigh 10 pleasant comments.

I realize that we all have the power to make such an impact on each others' lives whether we know each other or not.  A smile, being in the moment, having pleasant conversation, and having the intention of spreading kindness versus ill will can make a difference.  After my Costco shopping experience I actually prayed for the world and how angry it seems to be getting, and I prayed that I would take God in as my grace and kindness to others.  I know that by people being ugly and rude to me, that I have the choice to be ugly back or not.  While I don't want to sit back and take rude comments from people, I also don't want to incite more anger or rudeness back.  I just pray that each day I am able to make the choice to choose the power of kindness, to make someone else's day even if it's in the smallest way, and to make a difference.  We all have the choice to impact each other in a positive or a negative way, so why not choose kindness?

Lorna Jane - Spectacular workout wear!

Amber Sports Bra

I enjoy shopping.  What woman doesn't?  Okay, I know a few but most women enjoy shopping.  There has been this store that I've always gone past and never have gone in.  The clothes always seemed overly bright to me, and from the outside the colors made the clothes look cheap to me.  You know how they always say to never judge a book by it's cover?  Well, I judged and I was wrong.

Biometric Sports Bra

A few weeks ago I found myself walking past Lorna Jane, an Australian athletic clothing store to peer in and continued on my walk to get my hair cut.  The store intrigued me enough to stop in after getting my hair cut.  I walked around, looked at the clothes and to be honest I'm used to REI, Athleta, and Nike retail shops where it seems that everything is made out of a special fabric, bright colors, and prints.  Thank goodness the sales person, stopped me and asked me if I was looking for anything in particular.  Prior to her asking I was 50/50 on staying or walking out the door.  She chose some pieces for me, and I figured I'd give it a go.  I also grabbed a few running shorts from the sales rack, and went to the dressing room to try everything on.  The pieces that I chose didn't fit as well as what the sales person chose for me which is a rare occurrence in my shopping experience.  I typically know my body well and what looks good on my body.  She made mention that she had chosen clothes for my specific body type and I was impressed.

Apollo Excel S-Less Hoodie

The clothes she chose for me were spectacular.  All I could say was, "Wow, this brand really knows a woman's body."  I mean, talk about feeling like you look like a million bucks.  The clothes were well fitted, modern, and a little edgy which is where athletic clothes are heading.  It's all about how you can take your work out clothes to everyday wear.  When she brought me some booty shorts I cringed a little and said, "Typically those shorts don't look good on me.  I look better in running capris or leggings."  I tried them on, and again these shorts were something else.  I swear they could make any woman's tush look better than it does.  She said it was designed with rouching in the back to give more curve to the "cheeks".  I ended up getting some pieces (links included at the bottom) and although the clothes are expensive, they make you look and feel fabulous.  What's not to like about working out and feeling you look great in your athletic gear?  Lesson learned: Never judge until you try.

Champion Excel Short

Amber-Sports-Bra
Biometric-Sports-Bra
Apollo-S-Less-Excel-Hoodie
Champion-Excel-Short

October Challenge

So here we are almost at the end of October, and I needed to complete my October challenge of pushing myself to do something I wouldn't ordinarily do.  I know this isn't completely original but I chose to go to a coffee shop all by myself.  Yes, I go to coffee shops all the time but it's always to meet up with friends, have a first date, or to work on something.  This time it was to go by myself with no agenda except to push myself a little bit outside of my comfort zone.

I don't like going out to eat by myself, so I brought a book to read as my security blanket.  I chose Buster's Cafe simply because I've heard people talk about this cafe in South Pasadena, and it also received four stars on Yelp.  I went to the little cafe which is right by the railroad tracks, and is off of Mission Street which is filled with cute boutique shops and restaurants.  Upon entering the cafe, I thought how this was the kind of cafe I would go to when I travel.  It was cute, homey, and there were people sitting outside as well as inside the cafe.  I ordered a latte and an apple croissant, and went to go sit outside.  I strategically chose a little table in the shade where the chair faced the street.

So I have to admit that there are times when it's just nice to sit and stare out into space watching the trains go by, cars go by, and people walk and jog past me which also reminded me of sitting at cafes in Paris where the chairs are facing the street so you can people watch.  Oh and I should mention that people watching is really something I like to do.  I love to watch people, look at what they wear, listen to snippets of their conversations, see them interact, and feel like a part of it all.  As I was sitting I was reminded that sometimes we just need quiet moments like these to sit and watch the world go by.  Not once did I crack my book open since I was too fascinated by all that was going on around me.

To my left I heard an elderly couple talk and still enjoy each other's company.  I heard him say to her, "If you want to take the car then I always can take the bus."  I was reminded that there are still gentleman out there, and then in front of me I saw an athletic gentleman walking with a prosthetic leg when a lady on a bicycle jumped up to greet him.  Apparently he has a blog where she said she followed him and was inspired by his century rides and his participating in triathlons.  Hearing all of this made me smile, and the friend of the man with the prosthetic leg saw me smile and nodded at me with a smile.  These little interactions truly made my Saturday morning, and I realized that it's not so bad to do things alone because sometimes we are so busy with our lives that we forget to stop and truly smell the roses.  Or shall I say stop and enjoy what is going   on around us.

Ever want to make your own t shirt?

My friend told me about the retail clothing store Uniqlo coming to South Coast Plaza in Costa Mesa, CA.  The store is a Japanese clothing retailer that makes clothing for women, men, and children.  They have this awesome program on iPads where you can make your own t-shirt (UTme!).  You can draw, download a picture, add wording in, and then use different features such as splash, glitch, and mosaic.  It's super cool, so I went yesterday to check it out.  There wasn't a line, and I had the most helpful sales associate help me with the programming.  Her name is Lenne and she's a fashion merchandising student at California State University, Long Beach.  I think we spent almost 35 minutes playing with my blog header.  We worked on fading my blog header into the background using another color palette, cropped the borders, and used the "splash" function while trying to keep the integrity of the "Fashlete" heading. I couldn't have made my shirt without her awesome help!

It wasn't the easiest task, and after playing with my header for awhile I decided to keep it clean and add just a little splash.  We saved my header, I picked out a white t-shirt size, and it was sent to print. I was then given a slip of paper so I could come back to claim my t-shirt.  It only took about 10 -15 minutes, and voila my t-shirt was done.  It turned out a bit darker than I wanted and we couldn't get rid of the gray line at the top due to the actual cut and paste of my header. I still love it though, and now I can sport my blog header on my own t-shirt!  The total cost for me was $24.73 and that includes tax.  It's a super fun process, and is a great way to sport your own unique design.  It also would be a great gift                                                    to give to someone or it would be fun to do with a group of friends.  

Challenges

So I'll admit that change has been harder than I thought.  There have been a few things that have challenged me since moving.  I have had to question a friendship and ask myself if that person brings more positivity into my life or negativity.  I have also had a friend's mom try to push me into dating someone I am not interested in.  In the end I'm learning more about myself, setting boundaries, being more confrontational when times call for it, and I think part of this move is making me reflect more about who I am, how I deal with things, and where I need to improve.  

On a positive note, when I was in Alaska about a month ago I posed a challenge to myself and my friend.  Since moving to Pasadena I thought it would be a fun challenge to do at least one new thing/month alone that pushes me out of my comfort zone, causes me to interact with strangers, meet new people, and try new things.  Almost three years ago I heard about the Pasadena Roving Archers http://www.rovingarchers.com and always wanted to go and try archery in the park.  So since I've moved to Pasadena, I woke up at 6am this morning threw on my athletic clothes and drove myself to the park.  A line already had formed at 7am, and I got to talk to a few of the people in line.  They split us up into groups of 8, took us out to a range and taught us the basics of archery.  We got to practice quite a bit and after about an hour they took us back to the larger range where we had a balloon bullseye competition with the rest of the groups.  I should add that unfortunately this non-profit group is being threatened by a group that is opposed to the Pasadena Roving Archers that gives lessons to the public!  That is the one sad thing since this non profit group has been around since 1935.  I signed a petition to save archery in Pasadena and wrote to the Pasadena City Council.  What I can say is that the archery experience was a lot of fun, and reminded me that doing something different and meeting new people can be fun.  I hope to meet this challenge each month with enthusiasm and openness.  

Archery Range with the Pasadena Roving Archers

Being new to a city can bring on challenges in many forms from challenges with friends, challenges with setting boundaries, challenges with having to confront issues, challenges of working on yourself, and fun challenges like pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.  

Change can be good.

It has been almost two months since I have moved, and six weeks that I have lived in Pasadena since I was in Alaska for two weeks.  Since I have moved I have realized that sometimes it's not until you make a change that you realize you needed a change.  That's what happened to me.  My new job has been great, everyone has been so warm and inviting, and I didn't realize I missed people greeting me in the morning and saying good bye until I landed at my new job.  It's something so small, but having a hello in the morning and a good bye in the evening makes my day seem right.

The move hasn't been all smooth but has been filled with ups and downs with having ants, roaches, and a rat in my apartment.  Yet, along the way I have met some wonderful and helpful people to get me through it all.  The roaches and rat have been eradicated, and I ended up having the best conversation with the pest exterminator.  I had had a hard week and we ended up chatting with us both finding out that we're Christians.  We both ended up encouraging each other, and I just felt so taken care of.  I also got locked out of my apartment and had a stranger help me to break back into my apartment.  Through it all I keep meeting the kindest and warmest people who have helped me feel like this is where I am supposed to be.

I miss being by my Pacific Ocean so much, and I tried the Rose Bowl Track that gets 4.5 stars on Yelp.  Sorry Rose Bowl Track you did nothing for me except to give me 3+ miles of exercise.  All that experience means to me is I tried something new, I didn't like it so I'll find something that works for me.

There are times where I feel rather alone and I know I need to push myself to get out there, meet new people, make new friends, etc.  I have looked at meet up groups, events, and other things.  I just happened to be warming up my lunch today when a co-worker that I just met asked me how I was doing in Pasadena.  We started to talk and she gave me the best advice, "Don't rush it, it'll come.  Things will fall into place where you'll feel like this is your home.  You don't want to feel like you need to get out there and treat it like it's your job, otherwise it takes the fun out of it all."  I reflected upon her words and told her those were just the words I needed to hear.  She is right, I will explore my new "hood" in my own time, in my own way, and at my own pace.  Change can be good, but it doesn't have to be rushed.

Fear of Change

They say change is a good thing, but each person goes through their own process when it comes to change.  Some people embrace it whole heartedly while others resist and take a long time to finally accept it.  At the moment I am being faced with a huge change in my life.  In three weeks I will be moving to a new city, start a new job, and live all on my own.

I have pretty much lived all of my life in Huntington Beach.  It wasn't until 2007 that I started to exercise regularly and the beach and I became fast friends.  I run, bike, and paddleboard at the beach and I can't imagine it any other way.  It's where I process my day, stare at the beauty that is the ocean, and I have good talks and prayers with God there.  It is my home and my sanctuary.  As I contemplate my move I realize why it is so hard for me to embrace.  I am leaving my human family, my spiritual family, my full-time job family, and my part-time job family.  I am leaving 4 families all at the same time.  People say to me that I'm only going to be an hour away, but I know that I won't keep in touch with everyone and that makes me very sad.

At the same time though I know that change in life is sometimes necessary for more human and spiritual growth.  I know it will push me out of my comfort zone and my daily routines.  One part of me is very scared and sad, and the other part is sort of excited.  It reminds me of jumping into a swimming pool when I was very young.  At first I would be scared, but once I was in the pool I was having the time of my life.  So once I get to my new apartment I'm going to start a bucket list of all of the places and things I want to explore.  I want this to be an adventure, and I know it's all about the attitude I bring to it.  Once I am there I want to embrace it, but I know it will still be a process.

So in the words of Gail Sheehy, "If we don't change, we don't grow.  If we don't grow, we aren't really living."